Saturday, January 10, 2009

Broken


I'm having a hard time.

Today, I cannot stop thinking about the elementary school kids and babies I met in South Africa. I'm exhausted. Every face I encountered has been playing through the video tape in my head. The 4th grader who lost both his parents to AIDS. The 5th grader who cares for her 3 younger siblings because her mother is ill. The boy who wept uncontrollably when we left because his parents had perished the summer before and he couldn't bear the thought of Jonathan, one of our team members, leaving him.

Whenever I close my eyes, I can imagine the kids from Durban playing with Alex and Caleb. I've been imagining scenarios like registering my newly adopted daughter for school and cheering for my newly adopted son's t-ball game.

My son. My daughter.

I've spent the day doing research about the possibility of international adoption from South Africa. The prospects are grim. Even though South Africa has one of the highest rates of HIV/AIDS and consequentially, one of the highest rates of orphans, the country is largely closed to international adoption. I want these kids. I want them in my home, in my family, in my community. Yet, there's not a lot I can do. While millions of children in South Africa are orphaned each year, only 2,000 or so are adopted into families. There are huge roadblocks. Huge obstacles. Seemingly insurmountable challenges.

I'm pretty sure, though, that God is famous for making the unthinkable happen, for transforming impossibility into the miraculous.

So, tonight, I pray. I'm hitting my knees, petitioning the Creator, in fact, begging that doors will open, that I and my church will be permitted to parent these children, to love them and give them new life.




12 comments:

  1. I'm hitting my knees for God's miracle alongside you.

    If there's anything else I can do, I'd love to help.

    I nearly cried when I read this. It is a very powerful entry. I wish so desperately to adopt out of Kenya when I'm married. The heart indeed wants what it wants.

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  2. I'll be right there with you. What else can one do but pray?

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  3. My heart is broken right along with yours. I'll join you in praying and Liam and Finn would love a South African sister!!

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  4. The same was true with Kenya. I worked at an orphanage for two years and it was heartbreaking to leave.

    I am not AT ALL minimizing the need for South African children to be adopted. But there are other African countries with high orphan rates due to HIV that are more adoption friendly. Just a thought. :)

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  5. Hey Diane,

    I know, I know. But the restriction on adoption might be what's drawing me. I sort of have this personality defect (or asset) that makes me want to fight injustice and chart new territory. Plus, I held these babies. And, they cried really hard when I put them down (sigh).

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  6. Oh Jodie, I will be praying so much for this, too. I would be so thrilled for Jafta to have a cousin that looks like him. I know exactly what you mean about "uncharted territory". That's how we felt about all the obstacles with Haitian adoption.

    Have you seen this website:
    http://adoption.state.gov/pdf/total.pdf
    It shows all the visas issues in the past year to children adopted into the US, by individual country,

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  7. love you.

    crying with you.

    praying with you.

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  8. God is sooo faithful to accomplish those things He has placed on our hearts. My husband and I adopted a little boy from Haiti just over a year ago. There were tons of laws and other obstacles that should have made it completely impossible for us to bring this little boy into our family BUT God can and will move mountains on our behalf!!

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  9. I knew It!!! I told everyone when we were talking about your trip! I said Jodie is gonna come back and find a way to get one of those babies! I am so with you! Good luck, and If anyone can figure out a way..it is you! You go girl!

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  10. This just makes me smile!
    Can't wait to see what God does.............
    I too am broken for the orphan and can't wait for the day our family grows through adoption.

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  11. It breaks your heart doesn't it? I get the same desire sometimes just seeing the children/adolescents featured in our nearby city's newspaper. Couldn't we find a way to provide a place in our home, our lives for just one or two of these children? Give them an opportunity and much love and support. You make me think "why not"?

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